The Plastic Hippo

November 11, 2014

I promise to pay the bearer

Money

Like hearts, dreams, ambitions, mobile phones and the best wine glasses kept at the back of the cupboard for special occasions, promises are easily broken. There is a long and contemptuous tradition of politicians promising all manner of goodies to a gullible electorate without ever having any intention of coming up with the goods. When challenged to explain the failure to deliver pie-in-the-sky promises, the rulers with more ambition than heart usually ignore the awkward questions or sometimes talk of a change in circumstances or trot out the tired excuse that the promise was misunderstood by stupid voters.

The hilarious shambles in the House of Commons over the vote to have a vote on not having a vote to vote to enact a bill to re-adopt the European Arrest Warrant is just the latest farce in a long line of duplicitous wriggling that stretches back to the Stone Age. This particular pantomime, however, is different in that apart from being the funniest, it is likely to be something of a watershed moment for this awful coalition government. (more…)

November 8, 2014

Iron Chancellor

Via norton.com

Via norton.com

History might remember Otto von Bismarck as an aggressive, bullying stereotype in a silly pointy hat but, apart from the unpleasantness with Denmark, Austria and France, the Iron Chancellor managed to create a unified Germany and manufactured a relatively peaceful Western Europe until the turn of the 19th century. He also had a way with pithy one-liners some of which, even by today`s standards, are really rather funny. Proving forever that it is incorrect to suggest that Prussians lack a sense of humour, Otto once said:
“If you like laws and sausages, you should never watch either one being made.”

George Osborne might be remembered as a half-witted, inbred stereotype in what looks suspiciously like a silly syrup, but he has managed to create a disunited kingdom and an absolutely massive growth in manufacturing. Sadly, the only things being manufactured are distrust, division, distraction, despair and downright lies. If you like an equitable EU budget contribution adjustment and pork pies, look away now; preferably at that odd looking bloke over there eating a bacon butty. (more…)

November 1, 2014

Cry Woolf

Filed under: Law,Media,Politics,Society — theplastichippo @ 3:00 am
Tags: , , , , ,
Via londonist.com

Via londonist.com

Any suggestion that Home Secretary Theresa May is doing something other than a magnificent, skilful and professional job is complete nonsense and calls for her to resign or be sacked are merely petty, cheap political point scoring opportunism. Theresa May is doing an outstanding job at making sure that any serious investigation into allegations of the sexual abuse of children perpetrated by the powerful and the influential will never, ever, ever take place.

Even if we ignore some of the more outlandish rumours of depravity being circulated by delusional conspiracy theorists, the actions of a government vehemently stating the need for transparency, truth and justice indicates that some very dark secrets will remain forever secret and dark. (more…)

October 30, 2014

Swamp Thing

Filed under: Media,Politics,Rights,Society,World — theplastichippo @ 2:00 am
Tags: , , , , , ,
Via imdb.com

Via imdb.com

Sometimes, usually in the wee small hours I feel a little bit sad when I consider what this country has become. This self-indulgent melancholy is almost certainly fuelled by a glass or two of something nice and listening to Elgar played loud on headphones so as not to disturb the neighbours. Having dismissed BBC News as utter tosh, perusing other more reputable online news providers only adds to the feeling of being swamped by dejection.

Upon discovering that Vince Cable is to send a polite letter to bankers asking them nicely if they might like to consider, if at all possible, to think about not pillaging the national finances for personal gain, the increase in gloom became inversely proportional to the amount of single malt in the bottle. The bankers who brought about the collapse of the global economy through naked, reckless greed and have escaped scot free must be quaking in their boots at the prospect of being swamped by a polite letter from Vince Cable. It seems Vince needs time to develop Post Offices into branch banking which is a bit of a shame as Vince knowingly undersold the Royal Mail with the express intent of financial gain for overseas hedge funds and a bloke who just happens to be George Osborne`s best man. I sometimes become a little bit miffed when I consider what this country has become. (more…)

October 26, 2014

Disgusted of Chipping Norton

Image via upr.fr

Image via upr.fr

There can be few things as unintentionally funny as witnessing a conman bluster manufactured outrage after being accused of being a conman and then proven to be a conman. The usual defence of indignant silence when presented with evidential facts goes out of the window once the game is up. When the stock response to being caught red handed is not to dignify sordid allegations of being bang to rights with a rebuttal will not work, then the only course of action is to summon up carefully rehearsed apoplectic fury.

David Cameron`s tub-thumping lectern abuse in Brussels on Friday was not just hilarious, but also smacked of a chocolate covered kid denying he had stolen the Mars Bar. To be fair to the Chipping Norton conman, being presented with an unexpected bill for nearly £1.7billion would make any of us bang the table and search out someone to punch. The problem for Cameron is that no amount of synthetic anger can divert attention away from the fact that this useless Prime Minister has brought it on himself, or rather us as we will be paying the bill. (more…)

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