The Plastic Hippo

February 5, 2014

An over excitable individual

Filed under: Education,Politics — theplastichippo @ 10:10 pm
Tags: , ,

Disruptive influence

Michael Gove insists that classroom discipline and rigour are the essential foundations of a modern education so it is rather disappointing that the Secretary of State for Education is incapable of practicing what he preaches.

Even if we dismiss the fact that the justice system has judged certain of his actions as being unlawful and if we draw a discreet veil over the secretive and rather sinister goings-on within his department, Michael Gove is an excellent champion of children`s education. Forgetting the £1billion overspend on his bizarre obsession with Free Schools, the failure of the Academy programme and the transformation of Ofsted from a regulator to a crude instrument of political dogma, Michael Gove is clearly doing an brilliant job. Ignore the blatant cronyism, the suppressed reports, the tinkered statistics and loads of money going from the school budget into the pockets of Tory donors, supporters and yes men; Michael Gove is a genius. After all, standards and examination results have fallen through the floor since 2010.

Earlier this week, he stated publicly that he wished to make private and state education indistinguishable. Sadly, he failed to make clear if this bold innovation would result in state schools charging fees or private schools having their charitable status removed. Perhaps he means to encourage the ethos of public schools where arrogance, cruelty and vicious ambition are seen as virtues and bullying, beatings and casual sodomy involving some of the more attractive younger boys are actions considered as character forming. We need only to look at Michael Gove`s cabinet colleagues to measure the success of that particular educational model.

Gove`s charm offensive was enthusiastically reported by the BBC with no less than Nick Robinson telling the worshiping nation that Mr Gove is polite, softly-spoken, intelligent and a thoroughly nice chap who cares about children and their education. Sadly, a short time later, Michael not only let his parents, his teachers and his school down, but he also let himself down. The former Murdoch hack must be an expert on teaching because he is constantly able to tell teachers how to teach without having undertaken a teaching qualification or spending any time in a classroom that did not contain film crews or press photographers. Being so keen on rigour and discipline, Michael Gove must know that learning is as much about example as it is about memorising dates and times tables and constant meaningless, unnecessary testing. Unfortunately, Michael`s behaviour in the House of Commons and in general as the man in charge of education has given children both rich and poor free rein to lie, cheat, shout, bully and ignore any threat of sanction.

The role of Speaker of the House of Commons is considered to be the most difficult post in politics and my respect for John Bercow grows by the day. In keeping with Gove`s vision in dragging education back to the days of Tom Brown, perhaps Mr Speaker should avail himself with a dusty blackboard eraser which he could launch at the head of young Gove every time he disrupts a lesson. So, kids, tomorrow at school if you don`t like what you hear or you are a bit bored, just shout and wave your arms about. If one of those lazy, Marxist teachers tells you to stop, tell them to sod off. You are only emulating the Secretary of State for Education.

The following Youtube footage of today`s PMQ`s should, in my opinion, be a core resource in the National Curriculum and be played during every assembly in every school.

Update:
It seems that the above footage has been “removed by user”. It is a complete mystery as to why anyone would want to remove this material from the internet and only the most over excitable individual would dare to suggest that it is anything other than a technical glitch or copyright issue. Here is another version:

If by some remarkable coincidence this footage is also deleted, here is a rough transcript of what took place. The Speaker of the House of Commons, John Bercow, interrupted David Cameron during Prime Minister`s Questions with a call for order. He said:

“Mr Gove…(laughter and further calls for order)…you really, really are a very over excitable individual. You need to write out a thousand times, I will behave myself at Prime Minister`s Questions.”

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