The Plastic Hippo

May 10, 2014

There`ll always be an England

Filed under: Faith,History,Law,Media,Politics,Society,Walsall — theplastichippo @ 7:16 pm
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Via birminghammail.co.uk

Via birminghammail.co.uk

There now follows a party political broadcast on behalf of the little England party which is also the UK entry in the 2015 Eurovision Song Contest;

When Michael Flanders and Donald Swann performed A Song of Patriotic Prejudice in the early 60`s, the very idea of regional nationalism was as far-fetched as a black man in the White House or Russians owning London. The outrageous racism contained in the lyric would today cause an unholy row, a twitter storm and innumerable politicians calling for this sick filth to be banned. Back in the monochrome days of Harold Macmillan, however, things were more black and white. (more…)

May 7, 2014

A year of living dangerously

Filed under: History,Politics,Rights,Society — theplastichippo @ 4:07 am
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Via sabc.co.za

Via sabc.co.za

In slightly less than 364 days, polling stations across the United Kingdom will open for business in the great general election of 2015. We can be certain of this thanks to the Fixed-Term Parliaments Act 2011 which, for the first time, ensures power for five whole years. Previously, parliament could only be dissolved by Royal Prerogative on the advice of the Prime Minister under the Septennial Act 1715 and its 1911 amendment. The coalition changed all that. The result is that we now have a government that failed to secure a mandate and regardless of the damage it is doing, is almost impossible to remove until May 7 2015.

In slightly less than 13 days, polling stations will open for voting in local and European elections. Usually, this exercise of the democratic right to elected representation results in something less than a stampede but this year might just be different. (more…)

May 3, 2014

Catch a tiger by the toe

Filed under: Express and Swastika,Media,Wolverhampton — theplastichippo @ 4:00 am
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Farage via topspeed.com

Farage via topspeed.com

I never use the words poisonous unfunny pillock and would never use them apart from on those occasions when I actually use them or when describing Jeremy Clarkson. In that last sentence I did everything humanly possible not to use those words and I beg for your forgiveness as I am now informed that I mistakenly, accidently and inadvertently used them even though I hate them and never, ever use them. Whoever leaked the footage to the Daily Mirror will be taken outside and executed in front of their families.

In many ways, Jeremy Clarkson is a national treasure. He is a national treasure in that he should be illegally taken to a deserted island in the middle of an ocean, buried and then forgotten about. (more…)

May 1, 2014

Not Even Worth A Rotten Kipper

Filed under: Fiction,Politics — theplastichippo @ 4:01 am
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Via newarkcemeteryuk.com

Via newarkcemeteryuk.com

After careful consideration and to quell intense media speculation, I have decided that I will not be standing in the forthcoming by election in Newark; wherever that is.

I realise that the people of Newark will be inconsolable when they hear of this devastating news but as a man of the people and not in any way a career politician and knowing for certain that 100 per cent of the British population agree with everything I say, the electorate of that fine city in New Jersey just across the Hudson and Passaic rivers from New York will fully understand that their loss is the nation`s gain. More importantly, they deserve an explanation as to why my Sat Nav will not be set to their post codes. (more…)

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