The Plastic Hippo

June 8, 2015

Shake it all about

Filed under: Politics,World — theplastichippo @ 2:17 am
Tags: , , , , ,
Oh Hokey Cokey Cokey

Oh Hokey Cokey Cokey

There are some cynics who question the necessity of an in-out referendum on the UK`s continued membership of the European Union but, in the great scheme of things, such a ballot is absolutely vital. Cameron needs a referendum because he cannot control some of his more rabid backbenchers and would promise an arm and a leg if he thought it would help to see off the threat from the venomous Kippers.

The suspicion, trepidation and ill-informed antagonism that he has done so much to encourage particularly over Europe and immigration, has become a self-feeding epidemic of invented hate, fear and aggressive bigotry that could result in a “No” vote. The poison is out of the bottle and is spreading and no amount of weasel words from Cameron will stop it.

We have witnessed the embarrassing spectacle of a woefully poor British Prime Minister hauling his sorry backside around European capitals begging infinitely more capable leaders for help in saving his sorry backside. Now he prances at the G7 shindig with the demeanour of a spoilt child at a wedding. The more he stamps his feet, the more he will be told to keep quiet and behave.

The sweet irony is that Cameron has repeatedly stated that he wishes to remain within the EU and hopes to “reform” the cabal of Jonny Foreigners from within. He might have all the guile of a conman but he sadly lacks the intellect to achieve anything other than division, economic instability and dog-whistled scare mongering. He will be indulged by the grown-ups and will return in triumph spouting the reforms that he has achieved. The nation will, no doubt, rejoice at the concessions he will negotiate for the good of the United Kingdom.

Herring harvested from the North Atlantic fishing grounds will be allowed to be 2mm smaller by 2025; the subsidy entitlement to asparagus farmers in the Vale of Evesham will increase by one per cent by 2030; foreigners caught in possession of a surname containing no vowels will not be allowed to visit Dover and the City of London will be officially recognised as the world capital of money laundering, tax evasion and naked greed. Based on these massive reforms, the Prime Minister will order us to vote “Yes” to continued membership of the EU resulting in large numbers of the 36 per cent of the electorate who re-elected him to rush out and vote “No”. The poor chap is cringingly inept.

Cameron has some recent form on cynical subterfuge regarding referenda. The people of Scotland who voted “No” to independence based on dog-whistled scare mongering might not now believe a word that Cameron says. Within minutes of the referendum result being announced, the PM was on the doorstep announcing greater powers for England and this double-cross confirms the inevitable dissolution of the Union. The SNP might deny planning a second referendum but, like a Tory backbencher in front of a microphone, you just know that something bad is going to happen and Europe will be the catalyst for the decree nisi. Cameron came very close to breaking up the UK during the Scottish referendum and his actions since will result in divorce with Scotland awarded custody of the oil and England allowed supervised weekend visits to Trident submarines placed in care at a harbour in Pembrokeshire.

Having broken the UK, Cameron is now breaking Europe with his petulant foot stamping and arm waving. The greatest threat to European unity, stability and prosperity is not an implacable Germany, a confused France, an aggressive Russia or even a bankrupt and desperate Greece. It is a small group of predominately rich, white, men on the Tory benches who Cameron is frightened of. Of all the people in the UK, perhaps he was the most surprised by his re-election and now needs to play fast and loose with the nation`s future to secure his own future.

As the old song goes; “that`s what it`s all about”.

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