The Plastic Hippo

October 2, 2016

Strong message here


Following the shambolic pantomime describing itself as the Labour Party Conference in Liverpool, it has never been more obvious to any member of the voting public with half a brain that Jeremy Corbyn is completely unelectable. We know this to be fact because our independent media and the Conservative Party and the BBC and about 170 Labour MPs tell us so. They also tell us that he is scruffy, unpatriotic, devious, a liar, a hypocrite, a champagne socialist, a terrorist sympathiser, a cunning mastermind, stupid, evil, disloyal, dogmatic, a danger to national security and would probably urinate on a passing Corgi owned by Her Majesty the Queen.

Obviously, the five right-wing billionaires who own the printed press, the small group of anonymous Tory strategists running the country, the state broadcaster flirting dangerously close to charter compliance and about 170 Labour MPs worried about future employment wish Jeremy Corbyn to be unelectable and are morbidly familiar with having their wishes come true. The problem is, after a year of astonishing negativity, utterly preposterous smears, brutal personal attacks, nasty digs, front bench resignations and a vote of no confidence from Labour MPs who accuse unelectable Corbyn of disloyalty and fracturing the party, the bloke was re-elected as party leader increasing his share of the vote to 61.6 per cent.

Of those entitled to vote, 313,209 voted for Corbyn which is interestingly exactly 313,209 more votes than Theresa May received to become party leader and, therefore, Prime Minister. The backstabbing and blood-letting that occurred during that particular political coup was worthy of Shakespeare`s Hamlet so perhaps the Conservative Party should consider the RST at Stratford-upon-Avon as a conference venue rather than closing down the streets of Birmingham city centre for five days. The turnout in the Labour leadership election increased to 77.6 per cent which did not include an unknown number of Labour Party members suspended from the party and denied a vote because they were suspected of supporting Corbyn. It is less than heartening to know that contempt for democracy unites the political class.

Two separate academic reports have concluded that UK news outlets are blatantly biased against Jeremy Corbyn. A study by the London School of Economics found that three quarters of newspapers either ignore or distort Corbyn`s views and comments and act as an aggressive “attack dog” rather than a critical “watchdog”. A second study by Birkbeck University and the Media Reform Coalition found “clear and consistent bias” against Corbyn in both broadcast and online news feeds with his opponents being allowed double the coverage than his supporters. The study described a “strong tendency” within the BBC for its reporters to use pejorative language to describe Corbyn and his chums with words such as hostile, hard core, left-wing, radical, revolutionary and Marxist. With my very own ears I heard a senior BBC radio correspondent describe the Labour leadership election as “a battle between Marxists and moderates”.

The Independent Press Standards Organisation clearly states that news providers are obliged to “make a clear distinction between comment, conjecture and fact.” In other words, news is different from opinion. Obviously a newspaper owned by an American Australian crook who buys and sells British Prime Ministers as if they were sordid, bin-rummaging, phone-hacking private investigators or an owner who made his money from pornography or two disturbingly odd brothers or a tax averse Lord has the right to state an opinion as long as the opinion is not presented as news. Perhaps fans urinating on brave cops, immigrants causing cancer, poor people being a drain on profitability and hoorah for the blackshirts does not, in the real world, constitute actual news but are instead the bizarre imaginings of some seriously disturbed individuals.

The myths invented about Corbyn are legion and, for the most part, hilarious. We have heard about his “Chairman Mao style” bicycle, his “Lenin style” hat; his terraced house worth millions, his eccentric brother, his former wives, his academic failure and an invented ancestor who cruelly ran a workhouse. The now almost completely forgotten David Cameron described Corbyn as a “terrorist sympathiser” and a “threat to national security” because he said the death of Osama bin Laden was a tragedy. If you bother to check this out, you will find that Corbyn described the US sanctioned summary execution of the very unpleasant bin Laden as a tragedy because the bastard would not face justice or the eyes of his victim`s families in a court of law.

The handfuls` of excrement being thrown at Corbyn is not just being directed by the primates of the right or a biased media. Labour Party MPs and members are scooping up the stuff and hurling it with the gusto of an angry Bonobo. It seems strange that former Labour leaders who failed to be elected now ask for Corbyn to resign because he has no chance of being elected. Apparently, Corbyn controls the internet and is directing an army of bobble-hat trolls posting anti-Semitic, misogynistic and occasionally humorous messages. Hello out there…Jeremy Corbyn does not control Twitter. He cannot stop the flow of rubbish being emitted from sad and lonely inadequate onanists who can only express themselves through the medium of insult and hatred.

Just for the record, Jeremy Corbyn is the first western politician of any note to publicly apologise for the illegal and disastrous Iraq war and also for the record; he was nowhere near the picturesque borough of Wallasey when a brick was thrown and a window broken. Those that described the brick throwing incident as a “vile and disgusting” intimidation of one of Corbyn`s rivals have clearly never visited Wallasey where brick throwing is considered as a subtle and effective form of communication. Wallasey might wish to install its own nuclear deterrent.

The media elite considered Corbyn`s latest leader`s speech delivered just over the water from Wallasey and decided that this was a more confident Corbyn. To illustrate this unusual confidence, they ignored the detailed policy being expressed like Trade Union rights, the evil Work Capability Assessment, education, the NHS and arms sales to Saudi Arabia and instead discussed his first leader`s speech a year ago. Do you remember when he read out the stage direction on the autocue, “strong message here”? Oh, how we laughed.

The problem is that the vast majority of the population, including until recently Jeremy Corbyn, are unfamiliar with the workings of autocue and so this terrible lapse went unnoticed by the electorate. This is why we need to be constantly reminded that an MP who cannot master autocue cannot be trusted to run the country.

Unelectable? With the prospect of a Tory Party conference this week; maybe not if the electorate actually has a full rather than half a brain.

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