The Plastic Hippo

November 29, 2016


Filed under: Faith,History,Media,Politics — theplastichippo @ 2:00 am
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Apocalypse by Viktor Vasnetsov 1848-1926

Apocalypse by Viktor Vasnetsov 1848-1926

In terms of religious superstition, when Donald Trump talks of millions of illegal votes, Theresa May states that she is governed by her faith in Almighty God and Nigel Farage, without any sense of irony, claims that he is fear for his life, then it seems pretty certain that the end times are upon us.

Trump has suddenly realised what being POTUS entails and having made his point, is obviously attempting to reverse out of a position that he is clearly not qualified to occupy. Like Corporal Klinger in MASH, he is playing the diminished responsibility card in the hope that the people will let him go home. Why else would he pretend to be completely deranged in raving on about a rigged, not rigged, then rigged again election. He has realised that, unlike his business strategy, it is not easy to declare the United States bankrupt, write it off against tax and then start again.

Theresa May is not Jeanne d`Arc and the voices she is hearing in her head are not angels telling her what to do. As a daughter of the manse and practising member of the Church of England, she has told the Murdoch press that she derives the confidence to “do the right thing” from her religious beliefs. Sadly, she is not listening to the voices of her Bishops and Archbishops who tell her that her government are not being terribly Christian by deliberately harming the poor, the sick, the old and the young. Instead she listens to the voices of irrational hatred.

The ex – ex – ex – leader of UKIP, who has a habit of refusing to accept important positions that have never been offered to him in the first place, will become interim leader of bunch of half-wits again once he has returned from holiday in the US after discovering that the only position available at Trump Tower is cleaning out the urinals. The BNP ape crammed into a suit will inevitably end up before the courts for some misdemeanour involving farmyard animals and Farage will once again enjoy the fetish of being photographed and filmed after a childhood of experiencing severe ugliness which continues to this very day.

This poor, downtrodden individual recently told a group of newspaper proprietors, openly racist tycoons and other assorted millionaire right-wing xenophobes that yet another seismic shock will consign the political, professional class to the deepest pits of Hell. Nothing quite says down with elite than having a party at Claridge`s in Mayfair. Astonishingly, Farage told his guests that he had been part of the political, professional class for 25 years. He now claims that he cannot go out on a pub crawl around Westminster because of his support for Donald Trump and the poor love cannot leave his house without having security guards in attendance. Strangely, his job description locates him Brussels and Strasbourg and not Washington or Westminster but he does occasionally turn up at the EU to pick up his pay and allowances.

The riders are assembling. With Putin, Trump and a vastly irrelevant Farage mounting up, there is a vacancy for a fourth horseman of the apocalypse. In these crazy days of equal opportunity and political correctness, the fourth saddle might be available as a job share.

One can only assume that Theresa May and Marine Le Penn can ride side sadlle.


  1. Spot the difference. Klinger, a fictional character of Yemeni origin, (beautifully played by Jamie Farr), was well aware of what he was doing and why. But his basic humanity always triumphed over self interest.

    Regrettably, Trump, Farage, Le Penn and May are not fictional. Nor do they possess any quality that makes them seem remotely humorous, trustworthy or caring. Still, it could be worse. Frank Burns springs to mind.

    Hawkeye, Trapper, Hotlips, Radar and BJ better get scrubbed up.

    Comment by The Realist — November 29, 2016 @ 12:15 pm | Reply

  2. A pedantic churchwarden writes: Brown was a “son of the manse”, but May is a “daughter of the vicarage” (or maybe rectory, depending on who once got the tithes). As might be guessed from his naming his daughter after S. Theresa of Avila, the late Fr Hubert Brasier wasn’t at the protty end of the C of E, and wouldn’t appreciate being consigned to a Pictish Presbyterian residence. Otherwise, spot on,I think.

    Comment by Alan — November 29, 2016 @ 9:30 pm | Reply

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