The Plastic Hippo

September 1, 2017

Trust in me


Even when a mature democracy becomes a little dog-eared around the edges and the very definition of democracy presents wear and tear in more urgent need of refurbishment than a crumbling Palace of Westminster, the basic premise of the relationship between the governed and the government is based almost entirely on trust.

Consider who one should trust in a head-to-head between David Davis and Michel Barnier. Obviously Barnier is foreign so trust is at a premium but balance that against David Davis who is an idiot. After three rounds of negotiation, the likelihood of a smooth breakfast is further away than ever and Davis bumbles about without any semblance of a clue, a plan or an ounce of credibility. It could, of course, be an elaborate bluff with Davis killing time in the hope those who voted leave combust with anger at the lack of progress or simply die of old age. That would make Davis a genius but such a concept requires an awful lot of trust. (more…)

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June 8, 2017

Morning has broken…it`s time


With the result of the General Election now a foregone conclusion and with a guaranteed landslide heading towards President Theresa May, the BBC can at last stop searching the streets to interview former Labour voters who will now enthusiastically cast their ballot for Mrs May because the alternative in the sickening shape of Jeremy Corbyn who is simply unelectable.

The small group of newspaper owners can relax in their off-shore havens safe in the knowledge that their editors and hacks have informed the electorate that Jeremy Corbyn is a murdering terrorist who stamps on kittens for pleasure and will sell our children in order to fund a communist invasion from planet Mars.

Having made the sensible decision to announce the only proper result of the election before the polls have opened, mainstream media and sections of social media have spared the population the tiresome and quite unnecessary chore of actually going out to vote. Even a cursory glance at the published manifestos of the political parties would make it impossible for anyone other than a complete idiot not to vote Tory. (more…)

April 19, 2017

50 days of May

Via Getty Image archive

The Prime Minister, in her Easter sermon to the masses, was correct in her assertion that Holy Week is a moment to reflect and an important time for Christians and others to gather together with families and friends. She went on to say that there is a sense that people are coming together and uniting following a period of intense debate over the right future for our country. She spoke of one great union of people embracing the world by leaving the European Union even as our shared values bring us together. Her childhood in a vicarage taught her the Christian values of compassion, community, citizenship and the obligation we have to one another. (more…)

March 15, 2017

Get in the sea


It has only been three of four days but it seems that the sea swimmers of Clevedon featured on the BBC News ident have finally taken off their bathing caps and thrown in the proverbial beach towel. It would appear that, according to the BBC, these hardy souls who brave English coastal waters in the depth of winter represent both the “diversity” and the “oneness” of the Great British public and are ideal harbingers of our daily news. (more…)

January 28, 2017

Executive disorders

trump-may
It might just be possible to take in the deluge of effluent pouring out of the White House during the first week of Trump`s presidency with open-mouthed incredulity.

Another reaction might be to simply deny that such madness is possible 17 years into the 21st century and hope that if we close our eyes and make a wish then the whole thing will turn out to be a bad dream. A third coping mechanism might be to dismiss the deranged collection of executive orders as meaningless posturing only intended to grab a passing headline and a fourth straw to clutch at is that all of Trump`s hatred is unconstitutional and therefore unenforceable. It is relatively easy to explain and disregard Trump`s tub thumping as the product of a fragile ego, an unstable mind and a rather sad, desperate plea for attention. Sadly, the sorry spectacle of a British Prime Minister rushing to legitimise the descent into a new dark age is a fandango that is more difficult to fathom and one that will be difficult to forget. (more…)

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