The Plastic Hippo

June 3, 2017

Air sick


As the English language continues to gloriously expand and evolve, it has yet to create an adequate word or phrase to capture the true essence of what it means to be a spectator of political campaigning.

The German “schadenfreude” or the related “joie mauvaise” from the French describing an evil joy might explain taking pleasure at the misfortunes of others but does not quite capture the feeling of toe-curling discomfiture watching politicians dig holes armed with only sound bites and spurious facts and figures. Even the Spanish “verguenza ajena” which relates to the sublime if guilty delight of seeing total strangers making fools of themselves during episodes of vicarious embarrassment cannot fully encompass the feeling of wanting to look away even though continuing to look through fingers thrown across disbelieving eyes. The invented “freudenschade”, which cleverly flips the German original to mean expressing sorrow at the success or good fortune of other people, does not cut the linguistic mustard. The advantage of a snap election means that the inevitable gaffs, faux pas, howling examples of hysterical hypocrisy and moments of undiluted unmitigated madness are condensed into a few, brief weeks of something that has no satisfactory descriptor known within the English language. (more…)

April 22, 2017

Banned Aid

Via b3ta.com

It is difficult to decide what is the more entertaining aspect of an uncoiling election campaign; the hilarious posturing of repulsive and thoroughly nasty politicians braying their saintliness or the increasingly ridiculous and totally unachievable promises being made.

Labour cannot possibly provide free school meals for all primary school children by charging VAT on private schools fees and are bare-faced liars to suggest that this unwarranted attack on rich people forced to choose between a third annual holiday and the ritual humiliation of their offspring is fully funded. They would need to remove the charitable status awarded to the schools like Eton which operates as a business rather than a charity nurturing privileged toffs born expecting power. (more…)

April 15, 2017

Taking the Mick

For a government that is seemingly obsessed with legislation, Mrs May`s merry band of jesters are failing to bring into law measures that will protect the British public from the very real and present danger of unimaginable horror. We need as a matter of urgency, comprehensive and robust anti-embarrassment legislation.

Forget about the Great Repeal Bill with its statutory instruments and technical amendments which will allow the government to abolish laws that protect universal human rights and laws that at least attempt to reign in wealthy crooks. These laws will disappear without debate or vote as a barely cogent government seeks to take back control of democracy by becoming completely undemocratic. The 14 per cent of European law that is there to ensure equality, employment rights and a sustainable environment are trivial sideshows made up by Remoaners to divert attention away from their profoundly unpatriotic cowardice. This time last year we were all Leicester City fans but now we cringe at the sight of Leicester`s finest throwing beer bottles at the Madrid constabulary in the belief that this act will protect Gibraltar as encouraged by the embarrassingly dire Murdoch tabloid. (more…)

April 10, 2017

Jellyfish

Boris Johnson jelly

Ask any legitimate gathering of jellyfish, amoebas, plankton, protozoa and an accredited assortment of single-cell organisms making a living as newspaper editors and politicians and they will all agree that Bashar al-Assad, the 19th President of Syria, is basically a nasty piece of work.

His elder brother, Bassel al-Assad, managed to drive his Mercedes at high speed through fog into an unexpected obstacle and, according to the Syrian regime, died gloriously as “the martyr of the nation and the symbol for its youth”. If only he had survived he might be in a position to advise the youth of Syria not to drive too fast and always check your brake pipes. (more…)

January 28, 2017

Executive disorders

trump-may
It might just be possible to take in the deluge of effluent pouring out of the White House during the first week of Trump`s presidency with open-mouthed incredulity.

Another reaction might be to simply deny that such madness is possible 17 years into the 21st century and hope that if we close our eyes and make a wish then the whole thing will turn out to be a bad dream. A third coping mechanism might be to dismiss the deranged collection of executive orders as meaningless posturing only intended to grab a passing headline and a fourth straw to clutch at is that all of Trump`s hatred is unconstitutional and therefore unenforceable. It is relatively easy to explain and disregard Trump`s tub thumping as the product of a fragile ego, an unstable mind and a rather sad, desperate plea for attention. Sadly, the sorry spectacle of a British Prime Minister rushing to legitimise the descent into a new dark age is a fandango that is more difficult to fathom and one that will be difficult to forget. (more…)

Next Page »

Blog at WordPress.com.